A Kaia Wilson Primer

Kaia Wilson, 10 songs (Download)

So, I have had this post about Kaia sitting in draft form since December and just can't seem to finish it. I re-open it, make a few edits, leave it un-posted, and then forget about it until someone says something that reminds me of Kaia. Like today, when I came into work and Kate said, "So, Cleveland is hosting the Gay Games in 2014!" and my brain immediately jumped to, "Kaia is currently training to compete in the Gay Games in Cologne, Germany!" (You can view her ping-pong training videos on YouTube.) You would be surprised how often things seem to remind me of Kaia Wilson, unless of course you know me in real life, in which case you are probably subjected to my thoughts on Kaia Wilson on a semi-regular basis.

My original introduction for this post went something like this: So, yesterday I posted the Move Into the Villa Villakula comp, which got me thinking about Kaia Wilson (hah, like I am not always thinking about Kaia Wilson).

Which is more or less true. I do spend an awful lot of time thinking about Kaia Wilson. Or, at least, I spend a lot of time listening to her.

When I was looking for a picture to post with this entry, I stumbled upon a blog post on I Could Die Tomorrow that said something like, "Some people have swim coaches & other people have Kaia Wilson," which is a pretty succinct summary of my high school experience: no sports, but a whole lot of queercore. I got into Kaia my freshman or sophomore year of high school and maybe this is a little hyperbolic, but it felt like someone had thrown a life raft to me.

I feel like what I have to say about Kaia doesn't make a lot of sense. When I think about listening to Kaia, I think about being up late (too late), lying in my too-small twin bed and thinking about how much I didn't want to go to school, not tomorrow, not ever. I think about spending too much time with the wrong person. I think about the incidents of violence that regularly marked my adolescence. I think about difference -- how difference is defined, concealed, (eventually) embraced. I think about the simplest and most beautiful forms of expression.

Being under the covers, 14 years old, listening to Kaia sing about falling in love with Julie of the Wolves, and thinking about all of the things that seemed to be going wrong in my life was a strangely reassuring and cathartic experience.

So, I've put together a .zip file with 10 of my favorite Kaia songs, six from her solo albums, two from the Butchies' first album Are We Not Femme? and two Team Dresch tracks.

The songs in this folder are:

"Salamander" (from Kaia's self-titled solo debut)
"Statue" (from Kaia's self-titled solo debut)
"Freewheel" (from Team Dresch's Personal Best)
"Matter/Molecules/Thrills" (from Kaia's most recent solo album, Godmakesmonkeys)
"Disco" (from the Butchies' Are We Not Femme?)
"Off (Extended Dance Mix)" (from Kaia's solo album, Ladyman)
"Heartfelt" (from the Butchies' Are We Not Femme?)
"I Got You" (from Godmakesmonkeys)
"Where in the World is Greencastle, Indiana?" (from Ladyman)
"Hand Grenade" (from Team Dresch's Hand Grenade 7")

Kaia Wilson, 10 songs (Download)